14 Comments

“It feels like winning the lottery—the one with money. Didion couldn’t know this feeling.” Brilliant.

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Sep 2, 2022Liked by Jesus Rodriguez

Love this piece! Hit a chord on being unable to travel (of course nothing like you, but during COVID visa renewal has been a pain so I haven’t seen my family for 4+ years & can never travel internationally when friends decide to go on a cruise on a whim). Hit a chord on immigration, touching the same sea but with the imposed borders honing on us. Love it ❤️

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Aug 22, 2022Liked by Jesus Rodriguez

Definitely enjoyed it as someone who hasn’t spent much time in LA. I’m from the US, but I’ve lived outside the US for over ten years, so that time and place feeling, the energy of discovery, I’ve totally been there. Also the emotions and restrictions of travel.. and belonging/finding your place, were especially resonant.

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author

Thank you for reading, Caroline! 🌱

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Aug 20, 2022Liked by Jesus Rodriguez

I really really enjoyed this. Thanks!

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Aug 19, 2022Liked by Jesus Rodriguez

As a Spanish speaking person I thank you for writing about the struggle with your relationship to your mother tongue. I have occupied many academic and career spaces where my fellow brown Spanish speakers weren’t that now my Spanish is diminished. Now I’m also trying to speak and read more in Spanish so I can teach my son.

Any Spanish media (books or news websites) that you recommend?

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This is super brave and courageous and I’m glad you’re doing it. For medium-level Spanish speakers who are trying to learn/build up their vocabulary, I actually love the Duolingo Spanish podcast, which tells stories about places in the Spanish-speaking world by native speakers but a bit slower. If that’s too easy, then I recommend my favorite podcast of all time, Radio Ambulante, which has made waves through Latin America. It’s like a Spanish Radiolab or This American Life. In terms of print media, I love the Spanish op-ed section of the Washington Post, but also recommend finding and supporting the investigative newsrooms from your family’s country of origin. For me, that’s Efecto Cocuyo in Venezuela.

Suerte!!

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Thanks Jesus! Have fun in LA. OC isn’t too bad for a visit. Check out Disneyland and old towne orange (my city). We have an urth caffe too. Lol

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Aug 19, 2022Liked by Jesus Rodriguez

I'm so glad I stumbled upon this today-it is so beautifully and well written! It made me feel so understood, and let me look back on my own experience. Thank you for writing!

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author

Thank you for being here 💫

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Beautiful writing. You captured so much of what I love (and sometimes take for granted) about LA ❤️🌴

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It’s really a magical place. I loved its slowness.

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Aug 19, 2022Liked by Jesus Rodriguez

I had a stint in LA for college, and this — so lovingly written — was at once nostalgic and novel for me. I never noticed the flowers in the five years I lived there!!!! (I don’t think I would have been able to identify them anyway though 😅)

I also very much empathize on the discomfort around speaking the language of one’s family. Mine comes from a fear that I would be immediately outed as a foreigner/poser to a native Japanese person who wasn’t my mom. It shouldn’t be a big deal, like who cares? But I guess I care lol and it means I opt out of opportunities to speak it and fall out of practice. Definitely working through it.

Thank you for writing this! Got a little misty eyed on my commute this morning 🥲

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Aw thank you for reading, and thank you for this perspective. There’s a huge tension there, knowing that the only way to get better at a language is to practice it, but also feeling like the more you speak, the less yourself you are perceived to be. I think you should keep trying as much as you can 🌱

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